Tuesday, July 18, 2006

The Heat Is Getting To Me

Holy cow, it's hot. This heat is keeping me awake, so let's think about something else instead.

There's a genuine Wolverine mask prop replica available for pre-order that you can buy and display proudly in your home. It's made of stretchable leather, and comes with its own "museum-quality" display case and certificate of authenticity. There are only going to be 1000 of these beauties made, so you better pony up your $89.99 right away.


Now, I like the X-Men as much as any comic book geek, but you have to be a little off your rocker to want this. Even though it has its own case and a little name plaque, the "stretchable" leather almost begs someone to try it on. You know whoever buys this thing will want to put on the mask and run around pretending they're Wolverine.

The problem is that you're never going to look like the comic book Wolverine. You're just going to look like a guy in a silly $90 mask. Why do you think the movie Wolverine doesn't wear a mask? At best, you're going to look like this guy:

He's available for parties and public appearances. No kidding. Just look here. Actually, there's quite a selection of Marvel Super-Heroes you can book for your next Christmas party. Here are a few of my favorites:

Daredevil, looking a little tipsy (you can get Ben Affleck for an extra fifty bucks)


Spider-Girl?


The Thing, with a stylin' pair of board shorts

Someone's parents must be very proud. See? Comic books are good for you.

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